LIFE SKILLS & CHARACTER 

When we think about  the kind of character we want for our children, it’s clear that we want them to be able to judge what is right, care deeply about what is right, and then do what they believe to be right – even in the face of pressure from without and temptation  from within.

 

~ Thomas Lickona, Educating for Character (New York: Bantam, 1991)

Sow an act, and you reap a habit

Sow a habit, and you reap a character

Sow a character, and you reap destiny 

 

Charles Read 1814 - 1884

Know what good character is and make it a high priority - by Dr Thomas Lickona
Part 1
Part 2
Character Matters Need to Matter More Than Peers  by Dr. Thomas Lickona.

Award-winning psychologist and educator Thomas Lickona offers more than one hundred ractical strategies that parents and schools have used to help kids build strong personal character as the foundation for a purposeful, productive, and fulfilling life.

 

Succeeding in life takes character, and Lickona shows how irresponsible and destructive behavior can invariably be traced to the absence of good character and its ten essential qualities: wisdom, justice, fortitude, self-control, love, a positive attitude, hard work, integrity, gratitude, and humility.

 

The culmination of a lifetime’s work in character education from one the preeminent psychologists of our time, this landmark book gives us the tools we need to raise respectful and responsible children, create safe and effective schools, and build the caring and decent society in which we all want to live.

Resiliency, Social skills, Emotional skills, and Problem Solving skills

Resiliency: The human capacity to face, overcome and even be strengthened by the adversities of life…

 

Social skills: Social success is critical for broader success, and resiliency research shows that children who are popular, likeable and able to resolve conflicts with others are also more likely to succeed at school, and are generally more resilient than children with less developed social skills…

 

Emotional skills:  Emotional skills refers to a child's ability to deal with, manage, express and control his or her emotional states, including anger, sadness, excitement, anxiety and joy. Emotional self-regulation is an important aspect of resiliency.

 

Problem-solving skills: The capacity for effective problem solving is critical for resiliency. The capacity to deal effectively with adversity depends on a person having access to a range of flexible strategies for addressing conflict, seeking help, and dealing with unforeseen setbacks.

Resiliency, Social skills, Emotional skills, and Problem Solving skills

Resilience is being able to ‘bounce back’ from difficult times, setbacks, and other significant challenges.

 

It includes being able to deal effectively with pressure, and get through tough times with good outcomes.

 

Here are Eight Tips to raise resilient kids.

Parenting tip #1: Listen with your heart

Parenting tip #2: See the world through your child’s eyes

Parenting tip #3: Accept your children for who they are

Parenting tip #4: Develop strengths

Parenting tip #5: Teach that mistakes are an opportunity to learn

Parenting tip #6: Promote responsibility by giving responsibilities

Parenting tip #7: Teach your children to make their own decisions

Parenting tip #8: Discipline, but don’t denigrate

Take Back Your Kids: How to Teach and Get Respect - by William J. Doherty, Ph.D.

We are facing an epidemic of insecure parenting. We may now have the most child sensitive generation of parents the world has ever known—and the most confused and insecure. This generation has determined not to repeat the mistakes of its own parents, who expected unquestioning obedience. But in rejecting outmoded models of authority, parents are now skittish bout exercising any authority at all. 

 

Children raised with insecure parents grow up too soon, become preoccupied with consumer goods and peer acceptance, and focus their lives on frenetic activity outside the home. They know that their parents love them deeply and want to communicate sensitively with them, but they also know that their parents are unsure about what to require of them and how to say “no” to them  »

 

Raising Good Children by Dr. Thomas Lickona.

Raising decent, caring, and responsible children is the most complex and challenging job in every parent’s life—and an increasingly difficult one in today’s society. Here is the most authoritative book available on this crucial subject, a valuable and sensitive guide for parents who want their children to grow up with lifelong positive values.

 

Based on fascinating research, this groundbreaking work by psychologist and educator Dr. Thomas Lickona describes the predictable stages of moral development from birth to adulthood. And it offers you down-to-earth advice and guidance for each stage:

 

• Seven caring ways to discipline “terrible twos”

• Why your preschooler “lies” and how to handle it

• What to do about a four-year-old’s back talk

• How to handle your seven-year-old’s endless negotiations about what’s “fair”

• Why teens have trouble with peer pressure—and how to help them

• How to talk to your child about drugs, drinking, and sex

• How to help children of any age reason more clearly about what’s right and wrong PLUS . . . A list of more than one hundred children’s books that teach moral values, and much more.

How to Raise a Moral Child - by Dr. Michele Borba

I recently worked with PARENTS magazine to conduct an online survey of over 2400 moms. One question: “How do you hope your child turns out?” Next to health and happiness, most parents hoped their children would grow to be adults with solid character and strong morals. One thing is certain: parents who raise moral »

Character: Humility

A common misconception is that humility involves having a low self-esteem, a sense of unworthiness, and/or a lack of self-focus. However, true humility involves an accurate self-assessment, recognition of limitations, keeping accomplishments in perspective, and forgetting of the self. Humble people do not distort information to defend or verify their own image, and they do not need to see-or present- themselves as being better than they actually are. 

The VIA® Institute on Character set out and continues to advance both the science and practice of character and to fill the world with greater virtue via wisdom, courage, humanity, justice, temperance and transcendence.

Self-Awareness in a World of Constant Chatter - by Marilyn Price-Mitchell

The reason we should ask the question, and encourage children to explore silent spaces is because we know that self-awareness is vital to human development and learning. John Dewey, a renowned psychologist and education reformer, claimed that experiences alone were not enough. What is critical is an ability to perceive and then weave meaning from the threads of our experiences.

 

Self-awareness is the capacity to see ourselves as uniquely different from other people. It involves self-care —  knowing our own minds, feelings, bodies, and sensations enough to promote and sustain our physical, social, and emotional health.  Through reflection, we gain self-awareness and make meaning from our experiences. The creation of meaning is at the heart of what it means to be human.

 

Adolescence is a time when young people discover their unique identities. They need moments of silence to reflect on their experiences — to discover who they are as individuals, what kind of relationships they desire, and what they value and believe about life. Tuning out the noisy world helps young people develop the ability to reflect and grow.

How to Go From a Nagging Parent to a Master Motivator - by Sumitha Bhandarkar

Sumitha Bhandarkar is the founder of A Fine Parent. After making a bunch of mistakes and feeling perpetually like a crappy parent, one day she had the epiphany that Great Parents are Made, Not Born. She is now on a journey to become a better person, and a better parent one itty-bit at a time.

 

The one thing that we must focus on trying to completely avoid is criticism. After that, it is a matter of slowly moving the scale more and more to the right – one little sentence, one little act, one little response at a time!

Smart but Helpless Kids: Can Your Child Make It in the Real World?- 
by Kim Abraham LMSW and Marney Studaker-Cordner LMSW 

Over the past several decades, our society has moved increasingly toward “doing for” our children rather than “teaching how.” Are there things you’re doing for your child that he or she is capable of doing for themselves?

 

If your 10-year-old child or grandchild has ever shown you how to work your computer or phone, you know that the generation we are raising now is bright and full of promise. Their skillset is often based in technology. Don’t get us wrong. Those are great, necessary skills to have in today’s world. But what about those other skills? The ones that get us through power outages, budget crunches, stressful situations with people and daily tasks that require perseverance and problem solving? How can we strengthen this generation’s foundation of life skills?

 

Life Skills Checklists - By Christine Field

Taken from the © 2013 Focus on the Family. ThrivingFamily.com

 

Do you want your child to be prepared for the real world, but you don’t know where to start? Here is an age-specific list of abilities that will serve your child well as he or she grows into an independent adult.

 

Creativity is one of the most critical skills for the future  

Recent surveys of 1,500 CEOs and 17 countries agree.

 

The ability to dream, take chances, and create the things we imagine… these are the skills of entrepreneurs, innovators and change makers. Children are born with these exceptional talents, but research shows that over time they begin to lose them.

What is 21st century learning and citizenship all about? 
The Six Pillars of Character®

In 1992, the nonprofit Josephson Institute of Ethics hosted a gathering of experts in ethics and character education to find ways to work together, primarily by developing a common

language of core ethical values that transcend religious, political and socioeconomic differences.

 

The conference, held in Aspen, Colorado, produced the Aspen Declaration on Character Education, which identified the Six Pillars of Character — trustworthiness, respect,

responsibility, fairness, caring and citizenship. 





Trustworthiness

Be honest • Don’t deceive, cheat, or steal • Be reliable — do what you say you’ll do • Have the courage to do the right thing • Build a good reputation • Be loyal — stand by your family, friends, and country

 

Respect

Treat others with respect; follow the Golden Rule • Be tolerant and accepting of differences • Use good manners, not bad language • Be considerate of the feelings of others • Don’t threaten, hit or hurt anyone • Deal peacefully with anger, insults, and disagreements

 

Responsibility

Do what you are supposed to do • Plan ahead • Persevere: keep on trying! • Always do your best • Use self-control • Be self-disciplined • Think before you act — consider the consequences • Be accountable for your words, actions, and attitudes • Set a good example for others

 

Fairness

Play by the rules • Take turns and share • Be open-minded; listen to others • Don’t take advantage of others • Don’t blame others carelessly • Treat all people fairly

 

Caring

Be kind • Be compassionate and show you care • Express gratitude • Forgive others • Help people in need

 

Citizenship

Do your share to make your school and community better • Cooperate • Get involved in community affairs • Stay informed; vote • Be a good neighbor • Obey laws and rules • Respect authority • Protect the environment • Volunteer

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